Who pays for my wedding?
One of the more stressful aspects of planning a wedding revolves around the financial aspect, or to put it simply – who will pay for what. Historically speaking, tradition dictates that the bride’s family covers the bulk of expenses for the wedding. However, many couples these days don’t fit into the traditional mold so common sense and life circumstances are dictating how a wedding is financed over tradition. If you decide to go the “non-traditional” route, decide with your partner if you would like to request financial help from parents or other family members and then come up with a plan. Below are some commonly seen scenarios in financing a modern wedding:
- Couple Pays for the Wedding Themselves – Couples are not marrying as young as they once were and because of this, are often financially independent and possibly have been for years by the time they are planning their wedding. If this is you, you may decide to cover wedding expenses entirely on your own, maintaining complete autonomy with your partner in planning your wedding.
- Couple Shares Financial Responsibility with Parents – If this is you, be sensitive to different financial circumstances as you approach parents about sharing in wedding expenses. If parents agree to help pay for your wedding, have a conversation about what kind of role they will take. Maybe they will offer to pay for specific costs such as the venue or a reception, or perhaps you could ask them to help cover the cost of food or pay for a photographer. Other scenarios have families splitting costs evenly three ways between the couple and their parents or have each family paying for the guests that they invite. However you decide to share costs, be aware that as you accept help, parents may wish to have more of a say in wedding decisions such as guest lists, menu options, etc. Work together to find a balance where everyone’s voice is heard and compromises can be made if necessary.
- Bride and Groom’s Families Share Cost Equally – Some parents see it as their role to finance their child’s wedding or may simply want to provide that for their children. If this is acceptable to you and your partner, graciously accept the help but remember communication is still important. Having a conversation early on to discuss budget and expectation is wise to keep everyone on the same page and insure that your day is what you envisioned it would be.
However you decide to finance your special day, communication is key. Make sure assignments and responsibilities are clear and talk often to avoid misunderstanding and undue stress and you will be on the road to planning your dream wedding.
Categories: Wedding Officiant